Rantings from an ALMOST mad woman!

I have been really awfully stressed out of late...

Monday nights are always always blissful when I go for my 8.50pm Body Balance Class at the Orchard Gym...a mix of yoga, pilates and taiji always manages to calm me down...get my breathing centered...and after the nice relaxing ten-minute meditation part of the 1 hour class...I feel really zen-like...

So last night...as I sauntered out of the gym...I thought to myself...let's take the bus home..then i can sit down and enjoy the ride instead of being squashed in the MRT.

i thought wrong!

i found myself a seat, and was relaxed for ten minutes before a packful of idiotic teenagers got on the already fully bus (by then)....and talked at the top of their voices, squealed and shrieked everytime the bus swayed, or stop a little abruptly.

It took all the energy in me to stay quiet and NOT shout at them! I really thought I'd completely lose it if had burst out

"Can't you please reign in your pre-pubscent hormones and just SHUT UP and KEEP STILL!
I know all of you are completely enthused by bein out after 10pm on a MONDAY night because you are on holiday BUT there are some of us who have had a LONG LONG day and just need a LITTLE BIT OF PEACE AND QUIET AT THE END OF THE DAY!"...

sigh....

i almost threw myself out of the glass panel at the side of the bus...going completely berserk!

I need a holiday...sigh

happy happy birthday!

it's my birthday today! my favourite day of the year.... =)

i was a little worried that my birthday would truly suck this year as i was feeling very very down last week because of work-stress and the general fatigue from all the travelling i've been doing recently. BUT BUT BUT...my mood has picked up very much...i'm starting to wear colours again!
with me...how i dress reflects my mood. I wore a rich royal purple dress on Monday, bright green cardigan with gorgeous green earrings yesterday, and today I'm wearing a brand new satin striped white shirt with a gorgeous wrap-around bow thingee around my waist...and my lovely new Aerosoles wedges..and i feel like a million bucks!

My dad sent me to work today! so i feel like a princess worth a million bucks! and hey! somebody called me princess today- he hasn't done it for a long while. so it was nice...

this year's birthday was strange though...i bumped into one ex at the gym last night...one ex emailed me his birthday wishes today...and another pseudo-ex texted me this morning...makes me happy....that all the significant people in my life are still around, reachable, etc. I'd feel a little empty otherwise...

btw..i feel a year younger today! FABULOUS!

one of those days...

i'm having one of those days... no weeks...
my heart feels heavy... and i really need to focus on breathing...
lest the invisible dam of tears break...
and floods my soul with grief...

so irritating

photo courtesy of brommel. check out his other other great insights into life in Pakistan and in Manila. his photos are hilarious!

i spent another week in Lahore. It was pleasant, except the day of my departure, when i was stuck at the airport lounge with a 26 year old protocol officer who has really traditional ideas about women, work and politics.

i took all the patience in me not to stand up and slap him. i don't know what started it, but we started talking about women in the workforce. he made his stand pretty clear, that he didn't like the idea of women working, and no wife of his should have to work. he must be able to support his entire family. his wife's duties towards him would certainly be affected if she had to work and so that must not be- no honourable Muslim man should see his wife out and about, mingling freely with other men. It is not the Muslim way. He also proclaimed, that Islam teaches us that our women should not be allowed to work, etc. etc. When i said that the prophet's wife was a businesswoman, he retorted that she worked from home. Of course he supported himself by saying that all the Muslim 'saints'- the imam's at the mosque- teach everybody this.

Oh did i mention, at home, they do not allow their sisters or mother's to watch movies or listen to music, because it's not morally healthy for them to be exposed to all the love scenes etc.

Bloody hell! I was close to slapping him about 10 times during this conversation. Soo irritating!

it's not safe...

i was working on my laptop in the comforts of my cool hotel room when the phone rang...

S: Miss Iva, it is Sher Afghan.
I: Hello Sher, is anything the matter?
S: Yes, Mr Sumbal has requested for me to inform you that you should not leave the hotel unaccompanied. In light of the security situation, he has instructed that you should not travel around Lahore, except in the office vehicle.
I: I see. Thank you very much.
S: The van will be at your disposal. Please just inform me of where you would like to go, and I will arrange for the drive to pick you up and send you.
I: I know that there was a bomb blast 2 nights ago in Islamabad, but did anything else just occur?
S: Yes, Miss. There were more bomb blasts in Karachi today. Even though the bomb occurences were very far from Lahore, we think it is important to take precautionary measures.
I: I understand. Thank you.

BBC: Dozens killed in Pakistan blast (5 min ago)

staying out of islamabad

arrived in lahore last night...and we had planned to drive up to Bhurban where the workshop retreat was going to be conducted. Bhurban is a hill station about 3 hours above Islamabad. We would have had to drive through Islamabad to get to Bhurban.

I was really looking forward to this trip. Even lugged the big camera along with me, with great hope to see more of the north of Pakistan. Our initial plans were to stop in Islamabad on the way home, to meet with some organisations there. But we scrapped the plan last week, after the goings-on in the Lal Masjeed (Red Mosque). Then when some government offices were attacked, and the chinese visitors were kidnapped, we decided not to stop by Islamabad. But Lahore was still on, and so was Bhurban.

Received a call when i was going through immigration at the Allama Iqbal International Airport in Lahore last night. Bhurban was OFF. The Punjab gov called off the meeting, in fear of the latest developments. The siege at the Lal Masjeed, plus the end of the truce deal in the North-west Frontier. If violence breaks out in the North, and the repercussions were felt in Islamabad, we risked being stuck in Bhurban.

That wasn't a risk that the gov here was going to take. So i'm stuck in lahore for the next week...no Bhurban..sniff...maybe in Winter, if things slow down...

The situation

Not in our name

An article in Today by Asim Siddique, chairman of the City Circle, a network of young British Muslim professionals, which organises weekly public forums to debate issues of mutual concern between British Muslim communities and the wider society.

It is worth reading.... excerpts below...

NOT IN OUR NAME
Blaming foreign policy not the answer. Where are Muslim marches in revulsion against acts of terrors in Islam's name?

"The events of the last few days (terror attacks in Britain) have been sobering for all" ...


...." Diverting attention from the problems within the Muslim communities and blaming others- especially the West- is always more popular than the difficult task of self-scrutiny"....


...." And what part of UK foreign policy do the Islamist want the UK to change to tackle terrorism? Withdrawal from Iraq?"....


..." Even after British troops leave Iraq will these Mulsim groups be satisfied? of course not. Their list of grievances is endless: Afghanistan, Chechnya, Kashmir, Palestine, Burma...s long as the world is presented as one where the West is forever at war with Islam and Muslims there is nothing we can do to appease the terrorists and those who share their world view. Instead it is the extremist world view that must change"...


..."Where is their outrage at the 400 000 Muslims slaughtered in Darfu?"...


..."It is nowhere to be seen because the Darfurians have been masscred by fellow Muslims, not by the West. Hence it does not appear on the Islamist radar screen as 'grievance'. Such is the moral bankruptcy of this ideology"...


..."The radical Islamist ideology needs to be exposed to young Muslims for what it really is. A tool for the introduction of a medieval form of government that describes itself as an 'Islamic State' that is violent, retrogressive, discriminatory, a perversion of the sacred texts and a totalitarion dictatorship"...


..." What is required is for those that claim to represent and have influence among young British Muslims to proactively counter the extremist Islamic narrative."

i'm feeling hungry...

brought the family out to carousel...eaten there several times...since it's almost MFA's canteen and we're always hosting ppl there...but i thought it'll be a nice treat for the family...especially since it was mum's birthday....the food's not bad...better than when it was Cafe Vienna!

lovely red red roses

Ibu's birthday

Ayah's lovely conconction

i love love love salmon sashimi, especially in abundance


laksa wasn't too bad either


see food....seafood


the birthday girl's birthday cake...


look at the attap chees....

Britain's GOT talent

the concept was brilliant. it was everything American Idol isn't and will never be. 'Britain's Got Talent' is a talent show which is open to all, and allows just anyone the chance to win the top prize of performing for the Queen at the Royal Variety Special which is an annual affair.

What I love about the show?
1. the 9 back to back show concept: it managed to gain the interest of the entire nation, without it running out of steam. 9 days of pure packed exhiliration about Britain's talents!

2. the opportunity to see all walks of British life

3. Ant and Dec: they were witty and hilarious

4. actually intelligent judging from Piers, Amanda and Simon: this was so not- American 'Dawg' and rubbish bimbotic Paula Boobs jingling

5. real, unassuming talents

6. and GREAT GREAT BRITISH HUMOUR!


Simon Cowell was so likeable in this show. I kept telling ewan- 'it's probably because the English are so much more tolerable!'

My favourite won..... Paul Potts. And amazing mobile car salesman who is a true Operatic genius. He was just so likeable and unassuming! And oh my god, talented! His audition show was THE BEST! (i'm so getting his album when it comes out)

And i loved the Bar Wizards too. They were a bar juggling act. Their music was good, cheoreography was exciting...but most of all they were about FUN!



Let's hope Star World, AXN or TCS brings this show to Singapore cos it's really a great show!

ADB

I spent most of last week at ADB.

The building was a massive fortress, with an intricate maze of offices which kept me going round in circles. It succeeded in making me feel completely lost and out of place.

It was an intimidating time for me. The meetings were very taxing as I was kept on my toes by ADB officers most of whom were equipped with at least a PhD and 10 years of experience in developing countries under their belt. I felt totally ill-equipped. As i shared with a friend- I sometimes still feel like a young undergraduate with no or little responsibilities, and to be taken seriously as a subject matter expert and international consultant, was a responsibility that made me question my abilities and capabilities every step of the way.

It didn't help that my brown bag presentation was at the end of the trip, so each meeting made me review my slides, and rethink my position, question my hypothesis and ponder endlessly on the questions that would result. It was like preparing for my honours thesis presentation all over again.

An interesting incident was when I came into a meeting late, shook the hands of an ADB officer, and he said ," We've met before". My mind raced, trying to locate this person in my history. Looking at him hard, i remembered that I had a professor who looked very much like him, my eyes searched for his name ID and I realised it was Dr Bhatta- first semester NUS Undergrad, Introduction to Political Science. That was in 1998. Almost 10 years ago. He taught me for a semester and left right after for NZ. Who'd have thought I'd meeting him almost 10 years later. And who'd have thought he would have remembered me!

The rest of the meeting was terribly frigtening and challenging. I felt that he was scrutinising my performance, pouring over my every word assessing whether 'this one' had made the cut- whether I was a good product or a disaster from the system.

It was a harrowing time. But also a comletely exhilirating one.

Btw, I nailed my presentation. And was able to field the questions reasonably well, enough for me to say that I was pleased with myself.

June 2007- ADB Brown Bag Presentation and Meetings- one more major milestone for me!

manila.

another quick update.

things have been like this of late. quick. short. fast. updates. not like the jams i found myself stuck in while in Manila. lucky for us, we stayed at Discovery Suites which was only a stone's throw away from ADB. which meant less time spent whiling away my precious seconds stuck in traffic.

i'll post more photos as soon as i get my hands on my camera- which iman very happily kept with him.

do check out brommel
he's got great photos and insights of life in Manila.

till then....

quick update

i've been terribly busy.

just wanted to recommend Sano Bar- this Lebanese restaurant at One Fullerton. Was introduced to it for work and just keep going back there as I've made friends with the entertainment manager cum belly dancer. She's HOT! not just in looks but she's a fabulous belly dancer! I brought Iman out there with my colleagues and we had a fabulous time. It's fine dining so it's a little atas. but the food- especially the lamb chops are excellent. check it out!

i'm going back to Lahore soon. and there's a bird-flu out-break in Islamabad! yikes. i wonder how many unreported cases there are in the country?

barbie super-physicist!

Was surprised to hear this morning on the news about the Guidelines on Fair Employment Practices by the Tripartite Alliance for Fair Employment Practices. The news quoted that Halimah Yaacob said that this was to avoid practices of discrimination in the workplace. So employers should not ask about age, sex, marital status etc. when recruiting.

This was interesting.

We're looking at an effort to protect people from being unfairly treated on the basis of factors such as race and age, which really doesn't have any direct impact on their probable or potential performance. Although sometimes there are good reasons for wanting to recruit a chinese speaking candidate based on the demands of the work, so the guidelines spelt out very clearly that the reason behind the application criteria must be spelt out clearly.

I liked this paragraph:
" Race
Race should not be a criterion for the selection of job candidates as multi-racialism is a fundamental principle in Singapore. Selection based on race is unacceptable and job advertisements should not feature phrases like "chinese preferred" or "malay preferred".

I liked it as I've never read an advertisement with the phrase "malay preferred". Neither have I read one with "Indian preferred". But well, including the phrase "malay preferred" certainly makes the paragraph LOOK more multi racial.

I think iman will be happy too. As words or phrases which show a particular preference for a certain gender should not be used, such as "female working environment". I liked this- women are not the only ones who face gender discrimination. Iman's faced it, as they're not accustomed to having men in the early childhood industry, and some kindergartens have stressed that they are an all female working environment.

check out the guidelines here

However, with all this emphasis on protecting the applicant, it does seem as if the employer will have less choice? Or maybe not? I'm sure some employers would like to know whether a lady their employing is planning to have kids. I mean if you hire a woman you didn't know was gonna be pregnant in 2 months, and disappear away for a 3 month maternity leave, that would be tough on the bottom line. I know mega orgs won't have that much a problem, but how about our SMEs?

I suppose the intent is well and good. And it brings an awareness to people that they may be discriminating sub-conciously. I know when i was hiring, I threw out a handful of women's application based on their photographs that make them look like barbie doll bimbos who'd have trouble spelling the word 'cat'! With no photographs, maybe their resume would get them through the door, but would that still stop employers from throwing their application into the shredder after?

I'm sure that will still happen. But at least, they'd have a better chance getting through the door. Just like Ugly Betty- chances are better if they get through the door and have an opportunity to say something that would make us realise that an unattractive girl can be brainy and capable, or in my case, a Barbie doll look-a-like can be nuclear physicists too...although i don't know of any just yet...

startling lessons

i learnt a couple of new things regarding Punjab (Pakistan) while I was there...

There is a potential of 15 Billion dollars worth of trade between Pakistan and China. Currently the trade dollars amount to 5 Billion dollars only.

The economy has been growing at a steady rate of 8 to 9% anually for the last 5 years.

Poverty reduction has been reduced by 15% for the last 5 years and will reach the Millenium Development Goals by 2013, and by 2015 the poverty rate would be reduced to a single percentage digit.

Some startling facts:

85% of solid wastes in Punjab is not disposed of properly

Only 58% of Punjab have proper toilet facilities. And in some cases the toilets are used to store grain like wheat as there is poor irrigation and drainage facilities, and most of these toilets have no access to water and are too dry to be used, except as a handy storage area.

48% of hospital patients are treated for waterborne diseases

Only 48% of Punjab residents wash their hands before eating.

Only 58% wash their hands after using the lavatory.

And most shocking:

85% of baby deliveries/births are conducted by un-trained mid-wives.

Maternal Mortality is very very high in Pakistan. 1 in 120 women are victims of Maternal Mortality.

And...

Untrained midwives have been known to inject women with an injection meant for cattle to induce delivery. Obviously the injection is not suitable, and often is too strong causing the uterus to rupture almost immediately.

the next time you call a woman a fat cow...think about it a little.

guns and bobby

i was pretty disturbed about this entire Virginia tech massacre...when i left for Lahore last Saturday...i was still thinking about it...and spent my time on the aircraft mulling over articles on 'The Economist' edition on 'America's tragedy'.

The article discussed the assault-weapon ban which President Bill Clinton approved in 1994 (covering semi-automatic rifles plus high capacity magazines for handguns). The year before, the Democrats passed a bill imposing a requirement for background check. 'But the democrats believe they paid a high price for their courage: losing the House of Representatives in 1994 and the presidency in 2000. Bush has caused it to be much worse- he's let the assault weapon ban lapse.

The interesting thing the article pointed out, though, was that Americans are increasingly becoming more uncomfortable about gun possession, although they don't support a complete ban on weapons as there are too many weapons are out there already, and most of the public feel the need to own one to defend themselves.

I think strict gun-controls are a must. It would, at least, restrict access of young children/adults to guns.

I also watched Bobby on Krisworld. And the movie certainly struck a chord with me on the topic of my last entry. My favourite quote from the movie, and from his speech at the California Primaries...the last speech...before his assasination..

' Some look for scapegoats, others look for conspiracies, but this much is clear: violence breeds violence, repression brings retaliation, and only a cleansing of our whole society can remove this sickness from our souls.'
-Robert F Kennedy, Speech in Ohio, 05 April 1968

massacre, carnage & plastic bags

in the bus this morning. my book stayed in my bag. i was transfixed with the news about cho.

it started over breakfast. over my bowl of cereal, i read of how an Indonesian family's life was, in one fell swoop, altered forever. their son, a Virginia tech PhD student's life was taken. His family sold their house, car and god knows what to send their son to the 'land of the free' not knowing that they'd never see him alive again.

the next article that caught my eye was about how South Koreans from Korea were ashamed and disgusted that they were ethnically connected/linked/associated to this murderer named Cho.

typical. typical. we can expect that the debate will now not centre on whether one man's freedom to protect himself in the land of the free means 30 men's lives could be taken away in an instance? , but instead, on whether Asian's are pre-disposed to depression, insanity and aggression, etc. etc. I think we can certainly expect this from a great proportion of white-trash in the mid-west.

Koreans should hold their heads up high. I bet if that Korean boy stayed put in Korea, he would have been a happy bunny now. Ok, realistically- he may not be too happy, but i'm sure he wouldn't have been slinging a gun around taking photos of himself for a manifesto which clearly showed his discontent. He was a victim of alienation...someone revisit Marx pls?

back to the bus... CNA's next headline for its next new piece was- Carnage in Baghdad. 200 dead. 30 opposed to 200. One instance, the result of an alienated boy certainly disturbed, the other a result of a 'legitimate' orchestration of men in suits, i think- clearly disturbed too.

so what, another 200 in Baghdad, who cares?

I do.

And all the way across the continent, Singaporeans brought their own bags to NTUC and other major grocers.

Save the planet. Save humanity. Save ourselves.

it's been a funny week

it's been a funny week.

took the day off on monday and spent it with iman. that was lovely.

went to catch 251 the annabel chong based play on tuesday. dinner was absolutely delicious. we chilled at Harry's- that was nice. play was ok. i was a little upset that the play seemed to portray CHIJ Opera Estate students as either lesbians or Catholic hard-core fanatics who think exorcism will dispel the evil spirits that result in lesbian, sex-addicted behaviour. ok ok...maybe i'm being sensitive cos i am an ex- CHIJ Opera Estate student. But believe you me, non of us experimented like that...at least not that i knew off.

wednesday. had terrible migraine slept the whole day. until 11pm at night, when i took clarinase and proceeded to count sheep, read, watch tv till 5 am.

Thursday. Showered at 5am. had breakfast at 5.30 and was in office at 6 plus. and i was looking as radiant as a freshly plucked strawberry. all the way till 6pm. Met iman, had dinner and went home.

Crashed.

Friday. Woke up at 8.45 am. *&%T! Got into the office at 10am. Feeling ok but terribly upset that I was so so late. Luckily no fuss in the office about my arrival. Day went well. Went to Liang Court for dinner, had ice-cream and chilled with NPL and Fly...and Iman of course... went home before midnight.

Crashed.

Saturday. Dad woke me up to go for breakfast. Showered. Packed up lap-top and dressed up with intent of heading to the office after breakfast. During breakfast. Felt completely groggy. Went back home at 9.3oam and crashed.

It's now 2.24pm.

it's been a funny week.

is that seat taken?

three quarters through the flight, a tall ang-moh came to my seat and asked in an ozzie accent

Ang Moh: Is that seat next (next) to you taken?
Me: No (very politely)
Ang Moh: Is it ok if I sit there?
Me: No problem go ahead.
Ang Moh: Thanks. (he goes around, takes the seat, takes out his magazine and reads)
i continued to watch 'Pan's Labyrinth'.
Ang Moh: I had to move cos there was a huge BO problem in the area where I was seated.
Me: Oooohh...really? (beginning to be interested)
Ang Moh: oh yes! it was a mix of dried sweat, curry and stale smoke!
Me: Oh gosh that's bad (recalling a time when I went through the same ordeal)
Ang Moh: it wasn't so bad in the beginning but 3 hours ago, it started to stink real bad! It's worse than being in a curry restaurant!
Me: Yeah, cos then at least the curry smells fresh! (ba da bing!)
Ang Moh: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA! You're funny!

So that's how i struck up a conversation with Ed from Sydney who's a leather trader and Energy advisor. Cool huh? He's really funny and we had a good time chatting!

Anyhow, later when I resumed watching my movie, I suddenly got hit with a terrible odour. I turned and saw a lady. I turn to look at him, and he was nodding his head vigorously signalling that that was her! Man..he was NOT joking.

bali

i promised photos from Bali...this is my favourite one...

why is no so difficult to say

i have always had a problem of saying no.

i thought i had said it. i thought i had articulated it loud enough for everyone to hear. with conviction. with confidence. that no was no.

was it not loud enough? or can people see through the no. that a yes lingers behind. revealed with a plea. a request. with flattery?

i think i've had enough. i just wish i could convince people about it.

a conversation

a conversation i had with a foreigner last week.

She: Are you a practising Muslim?
Me: Well, what do you mean?
She: I'm Muslim, but I don't practise it.
Me: Oh. Well, I suppose I consider myself a practising Muslim although I don't practise as much as I should.
She: Oh, and do you have sex?
Me: Huh?....errr...
She: You have sunni, shia?
Me: Oh, sects. Yes we do.

tsk

griping about the Mrt...or rather its passengers

i usually take the bus to work. it's a much more pleasant experience. no crowd, or little if any. there's the tv mobile and enough room to almost curl up with a book if necessary.

but on days like this morning when i head to the gym, i'd hop onto the mrt at novena to head to work. and i dread the mrt ride in the mornings. if not for the fact that it takes almost half the time i'd rather climb up a bus.

getting onto the train at novena, means that i'm climbing into a jam-packed carriage squeezing myself almost spread out like jam at the door. today someone else jumped into the carriage squeezing me literally like jam between 2 slices of bread, except that the slice behind me had a big ass. Not only did he have a big ass, he was an ass. When we got to Newton, he refused to budge from the entrance/exit of the carriage. He just stood there, while i was face on with passengers desperate to get out of the train. I couldn't move cos he had me practically pinned there, between another guy, and it wasn't as if this ass was a small one!

so i started saying under my breadth:

'You have to step out of the train' repeatedly with my volume gradually increasing.

you have to step out of the train you have to sept out of the train you have to step out of the train YOU HAVE TO STEP OUT OF THE TRAIN YOU HAVE TO STEP OUT OF THE TRAIN

he finally got the message and stepped out. i think he was quite afraid of me cos he let me back into the train first after all the passengers got out of the train.

yeesh what is it about Singaporean train passengers. are we so ridiculously afraid that we can't get back onto the train?

anyway. i was surfing today and found that Virgin did a ranking of the top 11 metro/subway systems in the world. and we're not one of them the list goes:

1. London, England
2. Paris, France
3. Moscow, Russia
4. Madrid, Spain
5.Tokyo, Japan
6. Seoul, South Korea
7. New York City, USA
8. Montreal, Canada
9. Beijing, China
10.Sao Paolo, Brazil

I've been on the London Tube, the Seoul Subway and the NYC Subway- and hey i think we're just as efficient. Maybe not as beautiful as some of the stations in those cities- which boasts beautiful architecture and interior- but come on! NYC's subway's can be quite dirty, dark and gloomy.

but if passenger ettiquette had anything to do with the rating, i'm not surprised we're nowhere near the top!

runnin into rina

i didn't really run into rina. we had planned to meet. it's been eons. i can't even remember when was the last time we had met.

things have changed so so much. coffee used to be an excuse to spend hours mulling over life. meticulously labouring our every inner thought. we still do, perhaps not so meticulously, and certainly not over hours. minutes perhaps. lucky if we make an hour or two.

we haven't changed much i think. Rina is still the lovely dreamer that she is. a light spirited soul. sometimes i feel that her spirit is trapped in the physical. that she's meant to float by weightlessly. lightly. with nothing weighing her down.

between the two of us...i think i've altered more. have i forgotten how to dream endlessly and aimelessly? i can't seem to tell. i'm contented. i know. but i've forgotten how idealistically optimistic i was. it seems foolish now. but i remember when it meant everything to me.

peter pan. tell me whether what you know is true?

back from bali

i was quite upset that my time in bali came to an end...
but i must say that it's good to be home...
back in the crazy office...

i'll post photos of my trip soon...
and some good tips about bali...
if you're keen on going...

it was an eventful return. had some good news i hope to share with everyone soon...

luv u all....
so so much.

at lunch last friday

P: I, it's great to finally have lunch with you after all these months.
I: Yeah. I'm sorry. I've just been so busy!
P: Me too. Anyway, I'd really like to see you again, and more often too.
I: Oh.
P: No...I don't mean it that way. It's just that, you know...we should keep in touch.
I: Well yes, me too. Well since NUS is so near Holland V, I could swing by for lunch.
P: I would love to swing by to Holland V!
I: Ok then. Let's do that. We should identify a certain day of a month to meet every month.
P: Like what?
I: How about every last Friday of the month.
P: You make it sound like you're scheduling a monthly departmental meeting! So government!
I: But you know. It's really difficult with me. I always say, yes let's meet more often. but it never pans out.
P: Yeah! That's you! Always doing that.
I: See, so if we schedule it, it's more likely to happen!
P: Ok then. No every last Friday of the month is not good. Make it third Thursday of the month.
I: That's ok with me.
P: Ok then. But we have to skip this month. We'll start in April.
I: Cool.

*go figure*

again

i'm in the office again...
3rd Saturday in a row...
i know i know...
you're probably wondering why? if i'm so busy i have the time to 'idle'...
maybe because it keeps me sane...
after 3 hours of work in an office i see five days a week...
you just need to do something else...
and figuring as there's noone else to talk to beside surviving Chiam S.T and Viv (my fishies)...
this keeps me sane.

*sigh*

again.

again

it's happening again...
that feeling...
like the world is crashing around me...

HEAvEN-honey almond nougat

How often do you deserve indulgence?
After a hard day's work? Maybe just on your birthday?
Or when you've done a good deed?
Well you know what- life's too short.
Every day you breathe, indulge.
Take a square or a row of honey almond nougat
and let it melt in your mouth,
Because, for whatever reason,
you deserve it,
whenever.

bronchitis

i'm down with a nasty case of bronchitis. went to bed on friday night almost wheezing as i couldn't breathe without my chest hurting. aisyah woke me up at 5.30am reminding me that i wanted to go for body combat. i sat up and went straight back to bed telling her that i wasnt' feeling great. i woke up again at 7.30am. dressed. got out of the house. and walked right back in to lie down. my breadth was short and my chest hurt. i was afraid. headed to flame tree medical and was diagnosed with bronchitis!

Info source: Wikipedia

Bronchitis is an obstructive pulmonary disorder characterized by inflammation of the bronchilungs. Chronic bronchitis is often caused by smoking, and may be fatal. It is common in habitual tobacco smokers and residents of polluted cities. Like many disorders, bronchitis can be acute (short-term), or chronic (long-lasting). Chronic bronchitis is defined clinically as a persistent cough that produces sputum matter that is coughed up from the respiratory tract, for at least three months in two consecutive years. of the

Chronic bronchitis is predominantly caused by smoking, and has also been linked to pneumoconiosis, excessive alcohol consumption and exposure to cold and draught.^[1]

Symptoms

• An expectorating cough (the color of the mucus does not signify whether the infection is viral or bacterial)
• Dyspnea (Shortness of breath)
• Fatigue and/or malaise
• Mild fever
• Mild chest pains
• Vibration in chest when breathing

I definitely suffered from Dyspnea. Did i mention that iman was down with bronchitis a couple of days before me. Turns out that Bronchitis is infectious. And my case has nothing to do with smoking. you hear?

anyways.. what freaked me out completely was while the doctor was diagnosing me, she asked- have you travelled to or met with anyone from birdflu countries?

*panic*

"oh, i'm just asking to be extra careful."

*how comforting?*

....

i finally downloaded some photos. check them out

isn't he cute?

aren't i cute?

check out more photos here...

the colour red

i am bagelgal

first i've never liked murder mysteries. never. i didn't even know it was one when i picked it up in mumbai last year. all i knew was that i had just heard that pamuk was awarded the nobel prize for literature. and i couldn't say no to the book which in india cost me only a mere 8 dollars.

no regrets.

i've never read anything quite like this before...his perspective...fresh. his posturing between east and west. remarkable.the insights he provided into turkish history, culture and art. priceless.

if you're keen on picking a book...get your hands on this one...

Read an Excerpt


on a related subject...i'm running out of bookshelf space... i think i'll have to stop buying books..not until i get my own place...yeesh

my photojournalist friend

felix emailed me...telling me that he won 2nd place for the worldwide photoshare competition.

i think his photo was gorgeous... check out the other winning entries at

http://www.photoshare.org/contest/2006/06winners.php

Congratulations Felix!

Felix Masi

Rural deputy headteacher Jackson Kanani and other commuters wade through a flooded road to school in Funyula Basia, Kenya. Jackson, a teacher at Bukhwamba primary school, is one of the teachers facing the hardships of instilling knowledge in the future scholars and businessmen and women of Kenya. Some teachers travel as far as 15 km each day to get to school, and are poorly paid for their efforts.

Judges' Comment: This is a moving picture that talks about the efforts and conviction of those who believe in education to improve their living conditions.

hurrah champions of the ASEAN football cup 2007

it's monday morning and i'm still ole-ole-ole-ing....not out loud...but certainly i'm still celebrating last night's win! football fever's got me bad...watched the semi-final 2nd leg against Malaysia at the National Stadium...and also headed back there to watch Singapore kick Thailand's butt in the first leg of the finals! Last night match was the highlight of the week...

i spent the morning lazing about watchin telly...took a short nap in the afternoon. iman picked me up and we went to run some errands before heading to Vivo city... had a quick dinner of Long John's Silver- oooooo so sinful....my diet's def gone down the drain....and then made a quick stop at Naf Naf where i fell in love with a to die for retro black and white print top...that fit like a glove...

iman gave me an approving nod...and i could see the glimmer in his eyes... telling me to ignore the pricey price tag and to fish out my credit card...which i did. if i had thought about it some more the miser in me would have stopped me...but i was happy with the buy...

we then rushed to Zai's place at Normanton estate...oh man...it was a colonial semi-d...gorgeous...small, quaint, breezy with a beautiful pool in the front yard...perfect...i'd love to live in such a place....

together with the rest of my supper kakis...we cheered Singapore to their championship......

Congrats boys...and you too Zai!

photo source: http://cyberita.com.sg

easing me through the new year...

the last 2 days have been tough...

imagine having a persistent head cramp...one which makes you feel as if you're skull is shrinking an inch an hour...closing into all your senses...making your head frown...your eyes buldge out from the pressure...your heart begins to race...and your breathing shortens...

i haven't felt stress like this in a while....

and it's such a challenge...even to breathe in and out slowly...pushing in as much oxygen into the chest...to force yourself not to exhale hoping that it would help you stop the frantic beating of your heart...

that all things will return to normalcy soon...

that i'll feel human again...

i've changed my skin...

to remind me that there's much more to life than this...that i should take the time to sit back and relax...to enjoy the simplicities of life...

back..barbeque..sentosa..cafe del mar...

i got back on thursday morning..landed at 7.30 am...took a quick nap and was back in the office at 2pm...ta jie was calling me...telling me that IE needed something quick..iman came by the office..and we left early for a good dinner at sakae...japanese cuisine was just what i needed after a week and a half of naan, naan, naan and more naan.

...

headed to aloha loyang for a barbeque with iman's kk boys...was a hoot...i got to hang out with the kids inside...and enjoyed jojo's strumming of mat jiwang malay love songs...was good to be back..

...

cherie and rita from bangkok were in town. so iman and i picked them up at bugis junction and headed to Fong Seng for nasi lemak...rita loves nasi lemak... and where better to bring her...we then headed to Sentosa...it was almost nine by this time...and all the attractions were closed..but they still enjoyed looking at the ugly merlion and walking around...

we then checked out Cafel del Mar...i lurve lurve lurved the place...groovy tunes...gorgeous pool...and most decadent deck chairs and day beds...drinks were on me..and we spent the evening laughing over funny stories...


next time i head there...i'm bringing my bathing suit...

My Best Friend's Wedding

Speech about my best-friend at her Wedding Reception.

When Sonia asked me to say a few words at the wedding, I was hysterically happy. Then it dawned upon me that I would be MCeeing the wedding as well. I should not also be giving the speech. I conveyed this feeling of discomfort to Sonia, and her response was, “Why can’t you do both?”

I explained that it would appear to people as if I was hogging the limelight and attention, by trying to do both. I didn’t want people to think that I “shiok sendiri”. Her answer was a straight-forward, “Yes you can do both.. It doesn’t matter what people think!”

I’ve been friends with Sonia for almost 13 years now, and that’s what I love about her. She doesn’t care what people think as long as she know’s its right. And she knows I love attention and encourages it!

Seriously. Sonia left Singapore to study in Australia at 17. Before she left for Sydney, Sonia was a, this is the truth- you know it Son so don’t hate me!, a scatter-brain. I think she spent more time day-dreaming and in fantasies rather than making sure she knows how to get to point A to point B. Sonia was a notoriously bad navigator. She’d get lost at Takashimaya without someone to guide her! I used to make endless fun of her regarding this ‘quality’ of hers! And she’d get back at me for it.

Once when we were planning a design of a cruise-liner, don’t ask me why we did that, it was one of the things we did when we made up our minds that A Math was too difficult and didn’t deserve our undivided attention, she assigned us all positions like captain, crewman. I made a strong point that there was no way she could be the navigator. Sonia laughed it off, as if it didn’t matter at all how I was being so mean to her. But quietly as she finished her plan, she drew a tiny cabin, at the lowest rungs of the ship for me, next to the waste collection, which she designed to fuel the ship- and I was assigned to shovel that biological waste to keep the ship running. That was poetic justice for her.

I’ve never told her this I think, but the thing I loved and admired most about her was her sense of imagination, the fantasies that she paints in her head and sometimes articulates on paper. If you are one of the lucky few, and I think I am- Sonia could bring you to the ends of the earth, to see a palate of colours no man could ever describe, and launch you into delirious bouts of giggles when she opens your heart to the endless happy endings that you could encounter in one life.

Now Daniel. I’ve known Daniel now for, I dunno- I can’t recall when I first met him. Most of you probably don’t know him very well. I’ve spent, well not much time, but enough. We’ve played a round of silly golf together in Sydney, we’ve spent an afternoon at an amusement park, we’ve had brunch together. You know when I guy is a great guy, when he brings you to a golf course and never makes a face when you miss golf ball five times in a row after you’ve claimed to play golf since u were seven. You also know when a guy is great, when he beats 5 other seven year old at a funfair game so that his girlfriend’s friend could bring home a gorilla you named Eshay.

Actually, I’ve always been afraid of Daniel. Look at him. He’s a tall and looks so serious. And even when he’s trying to be funny, you’re not sure if he’s joking or being sarcastic, or scolding you. Daniel also comes in a package- you don’t get just Daniel but the entire Family of Pedemonts too. Which is probably the best part of the deal!

Anyway. Returning to my story. Sonia left after we did our O levels with another good friend of ours to study in Australia. When she left, a lot of us felt the loss of a great friend. I certainly felt completely hopeless. My best friend had left.

There were many times I wished that she had never left. But today, I’m happy. If she hadn’t left for Australia, she wouldn’t have met Daniel. And what a pair they make. Daniel is serious and meticulous enough a person to make sure Sonia the scatter brain keeps her act together. I know for a fact that Daniel is a capable navigator, so Sonia won’t get lost in another shopping centre again. And Sonia’s infectious passion for life injects the little giggle that our serious Daniel needs to colour his life (urmmm I think).

To the both of you, I’m deliriously happy for you. Thank you Sonia for the priviledge of being your friend, for staying in touch all these years, for always inviting me into your home in Sydney. Thank you for US4, for Bono and U2, for Mirabella, Night Shade and god- knows-what, for Les Mis, for always being a phone call away, for understanding that my crying over a burnt pecan pie was a symptom of a broken heart and not a culinary disaster, for never judging and for being a friend!

To Daniel, thank you for sharing your family with me, and for loving my friend. For she deserves all the love in the world.

Not so New- New Year's Eve and New Year

i know...i know... it's not so new...but i've been busy..too too busy...and now that i'm in Lahore..alone on a Sunday..i've finally found some time to say some things.... about the New Year and the Old Year...

i got to see the fireworks....it was my first time celebrating the New Year with hundreds and maybe thousands of other Singaporeans at the Esplanade area...Iman and I got a nice spot with a wonderful view...

the rest of the evening was spent at zouk...it was my first time at zouk too...so this was a New Year with many firsts...

and on New Year's day...my best friend Sonia had her wedding...the Singapore leg of the wedding that is...my best friend's married and she's also going to be a mommy...2007 is going to be an amazing year... i can just feel it....

e gorgeous couple

e 3 beauties

iman, su and e pedemonts